Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Pondering My Path For The New Year

I sit here realizing that the new year has taken me by surprise.  I mean I knew it was coming.  I had every intention of reflecting on the past year and mapping out this new one.  I had declared 2010 The Year of the Moments.  Just calling attention to the moments in my day, made me stop and realize that time is fleeting and each day is a gift.  I still got to hurried, I still rushed the littles, I still choose other things over time with them...but I made progress and I hope that living in the moment more caused me to be a better mother. 

As I think of this new year that has already arrived, I see my failures mounting each day.  I already have been too frustrated, to short with my answers, withholding patience and kindness from those I love the most.  The littles have seemed challenging the last few days, but maybe it is really me.  Maybe its time to finally take seriously the lack of gentleness in my words, the lack of patience in my response.  I think of it often...habit training myself.  How can I teach gentleness with siblings when I am too harsh at times?  How can I teach about a joyful heart, when mine appears to be irritated so easily? 

So after some thought, I am declaring 2011 the year of gentleness.  I will each day strive to respond to everyone and all situations with gentleness.  This will not be easy, but it is necessary.  My little ones are watching my responses.  My words are becoming a part of each of them.  I want those words etched on each heart to be gentle...words that give life...even in the midst of correction...words that offer grace...even when it is unmerited.

Why this year?  Why Now?
Because after twelve more winters this boy will be walking away from our home and into the place for which God is preparing him...
This boy needs grace...because we are so very different...He's just like his daddy...He's starting some school this year and I will have to extend patience and understanding every day.
And this girl needs gentleness at every moment of the day because...well, because...she's just like me...and that is oh so very hard...I see my faults magnified in the antics of this precious three-year-old.
Her expressions mimic what is in her heart...just as mine do...
And this little one needs kindness because she seems to have such a sweet spirit and I don't want my unkindness and frustrations to have a negative influence.

1 comment:

Heather Johnson said...

I needed this! Lately I've been getting annoyed to easy and taking it out on the ones I love the most. Maybe its these crazy prego hormones=)